I really don't know how to say any of this. I'm a man and i'm very lonely in my marriage but i still love her very much. About 4 years ago, my wife fell seriously ill, she could barely stand on her own, she went through a great depression thinking I would leave her over all this but I wasn't raised that way. I told her that I made a promise to love her in sickness and health and by God I was going to keep that promise. Well, the love never went out of our marriage but our s.x life and physical life went out the door. She feels that she's unattractive and hasn't let me touch her, besides a kiss, since. I tell her that none of the scars from the illness bothers me and that I see her as i've always seen her, beautiful, but nothing i say or do matters. Fast forward 2 and a half years and now she has developed breast cancer, stage one and we caught it very early. She has her lump removed and goes through 3 months of radiation therapy, me standing by her side the whole time promising to love her no matter what and NOW she understands and tells me that she loves me too and still as deeply as before, but she just doesn't want anything to do with physical love anymore and that i should just go get a girlfriend to play with so long as i come back home to her. I assumed it was the surgery and everything getting to her so I've been very patient with her and still loving her with all my heart...but...I miss being touched. I know i shouldn't feel this way and that i should just shut up and deal with it, but i'm getting depressed and i don't know what to do anymore. Please I need help because I am really depressed as I am married and living single.