I would like to know what to do with this issue. My husband and I have been married for 3 years and have a 1 year old child. My husband and I both work and have very good professional jobs. In fact in met me at this previous place of work. Before I got married and had kids I used to pay attention to my looks the way I dress, I love wearing makeup and high heels and I still do all these things even after pregnancy and have a baby. Of recent however when I am getting dressed in the morning and doing my makeup my husband will be making funny comments. Like why do I need to dress up so well or do makeup. Why am I wearing red lipstick etc. Why am I not more concerned with our son who while I am dressing up will be playing on the floor etc. So last night I asked him if it was a problem for me to dress nice or do makeup in the morning. He now answered that his mother has been complaining that I like too much shakara. She came for omugwo and I resumed from maternity leave while she was still here. He also told me his mother was 100% a mom after her children were born. She gained weight after she had kids and never tried to lose it. She wore normal clothes everyday and she was a nurse so she wore a uniform so if she wasn't in her work uniform she was in Ankara. She never did her hair or make up. Her entire identity was being a mother and she thinks my own way of dressing and behaviour is not mother-like. My husband said I don't care about our son since I worked on losing my baby weight and still put effort into my appearance. The sad thing about this issue is that me being my old self makes me happier and better able to be a mother. I love my son but I'm still me and I still have the things I like to do. Is it normal for new mothers to totally sacrifice all the things you like to do? I used to think men liked it when their wives and mothers of their children dressed well and looked good. All the women at work dress and look a certain way. Now having to change my appearance will begin to affect my self esteem. How can I explain to my husband that paying attention to my looks does not mean I am a bad mother?