I used to think it just me as a parent that was having issues with getting my older son to share his toys or anything that belongs to him with his younger brother (they were 3 and 1 years old) only for my friend to complain to me about the same thing concerning her kids. She complained bitterly of how the older boy will snatch his toys aways from the hands of his little sister and he won’t mind that she’s crying over it. He will always wants all of his things to himself to play with at the same time. Isn’t that just being selfish? And the truth is that is what kids younger kids are known for.
Young children are self centred and they tend to want things like food, toys and attention for themselves. Children are not matured enough to show sharing and you should not expect it to come naturally. Therefore, you must teach your child about sharing and what is the importance of that as well. If you are experiencing this with you child, be rest assured you are not alone because most of the children have to be taught about sharing and caring for others. Although, it will need some level of maturity to get this message conveyed, there are many steps that parents can take to teach their children art of sharing.
It Comes With Age-
Don’t expect a child less than two or 2½ to easily accept sharing. Children under two are into parallel play, playing alongside other children, but not with them. They care about themselves and their possessions and do not think about what the other child wants or feels. But, given guidance and generosity, the selfish two-year-old can become a generous three or four-year-old. As children begin to play with each other and cooperate in their play, they begin to see the value of sharing.
Be A Role Model-
If you want your child to share her toys with her sibling, you need to be the role model first. Being a good role model will provide plenty of benefits that will be added to your child’s behaviour.
Don’t Force The Child-
There is power in possession. To you, they’re only toys. To a child, they’re a valuable, prized collection that has taken years to assemble. Respect the normal possessiveness of children while you encourage and model sharing. Then watch how your child operates in a group play setting — you’ll learn a lot about your child and about what kind of guidance he’ll need. If your child is always the grabber, he’ll learn that other kids won’t want to play with him. If he’s always the victim, he needs to learn the power of saying “no.”
Know When To Step In-
When your child is with his playmates and there is tension over a toy, don’t butt in immediately. Stay on the sidelines and observe the struggle. If the group dynamics are going in the right direction and the children seem to be working the problem out among themselves, stay a bystander. If the situation is deteriorating, intervene. Self-directed learning — with or without a little help from caregivers — has the most lasting value.
Create An Alternative-
If you child is not willing to share his toys with his siblings or his friends, you can get new toys for the younger siblings. Kids can’t resist toys that are new to them. Soon your child will realize that he must share his own toys in order to get his hands on his playmate’s or that of his siblings toys. They will want to have a hold of that toy so he will be willing to share his toys.
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