"Marriage is hard" that was what my friend that got married 6 months ago told me over the phone. The statement could be true, living with a person for the rest of your life and accepting all of their flaws till death do you part can be hard.
It involves a lot of compromises, sacrifices and selflessness. A selfish and self-centered person can't survive in a marriage. As hard as it may seem, here are some practical things couples can do to ensure they keep the spark going in the union. Having a happy marriage is not fiction or Hollywood movies.
Don't Be Possessive
You can't get married to someone and expect him to cut ties with all the people in his/her life just because they are married to you now. Try to be accommodating, your spouse's friends/family are your friends and families now and the same applies to your friends and families too.
Don’t look upon your in-laws with disdain when they come visiting, they brought him up just the way your parents brought you up. He is still their son just as you are still a daughter to your parents.
Don't Be Competitive
Marriage is not a competition between you and your spouse or your mother-in-law. If your spouse praises his mom’s cooking, do not get upset. Her cooking was the first he tasted and the memory will never fade. So you should not feel insecure or jealous about that. You are his wife and she is his mother, every have their place.
Don't Create Embarrassing Scene
Do not argue while in the company of others. I have seen couples sulk in parties because their spouse had a drink or food. Iron out your differences before leaving home or when you get home.Your marriage should not be for the public eyes.
Avoid Using The Word 'I"
The coming together of a man and a woman in marriage is to become ONE. Even the bible says when joined together, you have become a body. You are a team now and there’s no “I” in the TEAM. Always let the world know that you are both together in every decision you make, right or wrong. carry your spouse along in everything you are doing, don't let them feel left out.
Don't Gloat At Them
If your spouse's made a wrong decision you previously advised them on, don't be too itchy to say “I told you so”. Instead, assure him that it’s alright and move on. We all make mistakes and learn from it. You should be their best critic and their best cheerleader.
Have A "ME" Time
It's good to be around your spouse and do things together but once a while, you should have some time to yourself to do those things that are not of interest to your hubby. Let everyone have their space. It could be your hobbies or hanging out with friends. When you meet with your spouse after, you will have lots of things to talk about.
Sense Of Humour
Don't be too rigid. Develop a sense of humor, laugh at each other silly mistakes. Make fun of each other, tease him/her. Laugh at his/her jokes.
Have a smile on your face, talk gently to one another and most importantly – to exercise all the above, develop immense patience.