The 6 Threats To Marriage That Couples Usually Overlook

When things are going bad in a marriage, everyone gangs up and point accusing fingers at communication. They say "If they had communicated more, maybe they would have resolved their differences" But that is a fat-faced lie and it's unfair to rain all the blames on poor communication when the real culprits go free.

The truth is a lot of things are going wrong in marriages, yet we close our eyes to them, then when things finally fall apart, and the marriage is shaky we cry holy hell when we could have done something before the situation entered the mucky mud.

Knowing what the other threats to marriages are will help us better work on our marriage. And here are the 6 threats to  marriage which couples usually ignore and chose to point accusing fingers at communication instead;

1. We marry people because we like who they are forgetting that People change

When the foundation is bad, what can the righteous do? When you marry someone for who they are or who you want them to become. There's sure to be a problem when they don't turn out to be who you expect them to be. Marry because of who they are determined to be, and join hands together to be who they want to be, as they help you with your dream too. It's never too late, help your man be who he wants to be, don't force him to be who you want him to be.

2. Marriage doesn’t take away our loneliness

Life is lonely, and if you marry hoping to change this condition then you have a lot to learn. Marriage is a place where two humans can take away each others loneliness for a while by sharing, creating moments which makes the loneliness to go away. You can't always be lonely but you can't always be unlonely. in your bid to cure the loneliness don't try to look for companionship outside, because even that companion will only last awhile before they bore you.

3. Ego wins

We all have ego and it could have worked for us in the past, but in marriage, it's a wall that separates couples. It has to crumble, if not the marriage will crumble. Be open to each other, hear out your spouse's opinion and judge it without bias, and accept that the husband is the head over the house. Forgive, don't revenge, be openinstead of being defensive, apologise instead of laying blames, and be graceful instead of struggling for power with your spouse.

4. Life is messy and marriage is life

Marriage is messy, and when things go messy, instead of accepting our fault and finding solutions, we lay blames, adding unneccesary mess to the mess on ground. Stop laying accusing fingers Mamalettes but instead join hands together, even though you know you are right. It is only then that you can successfully walk through the mucky waters of life together and come out blameless and united.

 

5. We care more about our children than the one we made them with

The two of you were there before kids, so your kids shouldn't come first before your marriage, neither should they be less important. Find balance dear mamalette, if you're waiting for your kids to grow up before working on your marriage, it might be too late.

6. Distractions are everywhere 

In our world today, our attention is being pulled in a million place at the same time. So we lose sight of which one to focus on. Attend to your marriage and your normal life, and when you sight distraction, run back to your marriage, as many times as you have to. It's the only way a marriage can strive.