What is separation anxiety?

This is what happens when you’re going to work and you hand your baby or toddler over to the childminder or nursery assistant and he or she locks on to your legs all his/her might and then screams inconsolably as you attempt to leave.

Your child becomes distressed when they realise that you are leaving and cannot understand that the situation is temporary and that he/she is not being abandoned.

Separation anxiety is an entirely normal part of child development and is a perfectly normal stage of development when a child starts to realise that he/she is a different person from his/her mummy or carer and gets freaked out when you leave the room etc.

Usually the peak time for onset of separation anxiety may be at about eight or nine months and starts to diminish from about 18 months. This timeline would however vary from child to child like most other areas of development. Some children however never seem to show any particular signs of separation anxiety and different children develop separation anxiety to different degrees and at different stages.

If you notice that your child may be displaying signs of separation anxiety, you can help your baby by;

Waiting a little

Staying a little longer once you drop your baby off at daycare in the first few weeks will help your child feel more secure in his/her new environment.

Waving goodbye

Making sure that you wave goodbye, and tell him when you are leaving. As it is even scarier for your child if he suddenly realises that you have disappeared.

Not showing your emotions

If you are feeling bad, or sad, about leaving your toddler for a while, try to avoid showing it as children pick up on your mood.

Talking to your baby

Make sure that you tell your child in a simple language where you are going, and how long you will be. Even if he can’t talk all that much yet, you can be sure that he will understand.

Training your child

If you leave him alone for short periods at first, and then return, he will start to understand that when mummy leaves, she always comes back.

Has your child displayed any signs of separation anxiety lately if so, how have you been able to deal with it?