As a mom of 2, my kids are 10 and 8 years old respectively. I look at them now and I can’t see them doing all the things people cautioned me about when I was raising them as babies. When I had my first baby, I got tons of advice from experienced moms on what to do and what not to do. Some of it, I find it absurd. I did some of it if my instinct tells me it’s the right thing to do and some I don’t and I’m not apologetic about it because, at the end, none of it ended up been true. Here are lists of all the parenting myths I was bombarded with as a new mom-
Don’t Sing To Your Baby-
My mother-in-law came for the usual omugwo, she saw me singing to my baby while feeding him and she told me to stop it that the baby will be used to it and he will make it a habit and it’s a bad habit. I thought to myself it’s just a baby, anyone can sing to a baby. My baby is now 8 years old and he does not need me to sing to him to eat.
Don’t Rock Your Baby To Sleep-
I’m sure I’m not the only mom that has heard this before. I was told not to rock my baby because he won’t be able to sleep without that and that we are going to turn into that (slightly creepy) mom from "I'll Love You Forever" rocking her son on her lap? Do I still rock him to sleep now, No!
Don’t Co-Sleep With Your Baby-
How often do we convince ourselves that if our children cosleep, they will never be able to sleep in their own beds without using us as their personal teddy bears? My son does not want me near his bed.
Don’t Bribe Them With Sweet-
Back then, my son will wake up to ask for sweet and my mom will caution me not to give him that he will be spoil. How often do we tell ourselves that if we give our toddler a piece of sweet for using the toilet, he will demand it her kindergarten teacher? It was just with me.
We do it all the time, right? Something is working, but you get that twinge of anxiety, either from somebody else or from deep inside ourselves, telling us that our kid is going to create a "bad" habit, one that's going to be nearly impossible to break.
So we stop doing what's working for us and our child to quench that fear and appease the masses.
So if you're a new parent, let me speak directly into your worries: If something you are doing is working right now for you and for your baby, please keep doing it.
Keep cutting those foods into shapes if that's what it takes to get him to eat it. Keep patting that diapered butt to the tune of “Old MacDonald Has A Cow” if that's what gets him to fall asleep. Keep the white noise as long as you need it. Keep buying teddy bear as backups just in case your daughter leaves her most prized possession at daycare. Someday your child will wean. Someday he will sleep on his own. Someday she will be completely potty-trained. Someday he will eat an actual food. And despite Daddy and doctor's fears to the contrary, someday that stubborn little music-loving baby will tell his mom to stop singing so he can concentrate on his video game. If your baby wants to sleep on you, let them sleep. By the time he or she is 15, there will be no one to snuggle anymore.
So for now sing, Mama, sing.
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