To My Child,
I’m sorry I’ve not given you my time today. I know you wish we could spend more time together. And I really wish we could too, but today I just don’t have the time. I know you are sad, but I feel worse. There’s nothing I wanted more than to spend a good deal of my time with you.
I’m reminded all the time of how fast you are growing up, from your outgrown favourite shoes to the wise saying of my friends that “Soon, she will be in the university”
At the thought that you will soon be apart from me, I wish I could spend all of this time with you. But today I couldn’t play with you nor hold you close because the workload at home and at work is endless. I have so many things to attend to in so little time. I’m busier than I ever imagined I would be. And it hurts me to imagine I’m missing out on so many things going on in your life. But like I always say, I’ll find time to be with you tomorrow.
This isn’t fair, and I know that’s what you think too but please try and understand. Understand that I can’t be as involved in your school activities like other parents do because that doesn’t mean I love you less. And it’s because of the love I have for you that I’m working so hard to make a better life for you. Right now you might be too young to understand but someday you will. I hope that someday when you have a family of your own, you will look back and see that all I did was for you, because I love you.
I know I keep telling you I’ll spend time with you tomorrow, and tomorrow never comes. Right now, you don’t understand and I can’t seem to understand why, Is it because I keep saying “Let me get this done today, so I’ll have time for you tomorrow?” When you said I don’t love you because I always promise to spend time with you, tomorrow my heart sank, and I don’t understand why you don’t seem to understand the sacrifices I’m making for you.
Today, all you see is that your mother is always running off and she’s too busy to spend time with you. And when I tried to explain it all to you again, I had to stop when I saw the tears flowing down your young cheeks, and your words “I only want you, is that too much to ask for?” Made me wonder if probably I’m the one who doesn’t understand.
Maybe you are right, I’ve been focusing more on tomorrow while forgetting to give you what you need today. Maybe I’ve failed you by thinking one day you will look back on the sacrifices I’ve made and understand that’s why I didn’t give you enough of my time. Not once did it occur to me that I might be the one to look back and realise that I never understood you or that all you needed was my love and time.
Maybe everything you need to learn in life should be taught to you right now, not left till tomorrow.
Today, I need you to know that I love you and I’m sorry I thought you were the one who didn’t understand, never stopping to think that maybe- it was me who did not realise that today means more to you than tomorrow.
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