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Step parenting is so much work yet it goes unappreciated. When I agreed to marry Stephanie's dad, I did because I had evaluated her personality, not just her dad's and I felt I could cope, I was so wrong.....
When my husband Lekan died almost two years into our wedding while I was pregnant with our first child I was devastated, I wanted to die.
How could he be so selfish as to plant his seed into me and leave me just like that, I contemplated aborting the baby but for the sake of our love and the fact that if the baby is aborted he would have had no impact in life, I left the pregnancy, and to God be the glory I had an easy labour and birth, I named my son Olabode.
When he was about 3 years old and I 28, I decided it was time I find myself a man so Bode would grow up to have a father figure around him, I nurtured my son so he can be friendly and receptive of people and I prayed and hoped that I would find a man that would love me and my child equally.
My prayer was answered, when I met Stephanie's father, a 40 years old divorcee with two children, a son (14) who was staying with his mom and a daughter Stephanie (11) who was with her dad.
Stephanie as I found, was the apple of her dad's eye but very friendly, the day we met, I made her hair for her which she liked very much and took different snapshots of, that day we striked a friendship pact and she immediately started calling my son "lil bro".
I love her and she loves me too but being a step-mother is hardwork, Steph isn't mean like most stepchildren but we have our moments. Those awkward moments when they'd ask for her mom and when I step in, she'll use the word "she's not my real mom" or when she says things like "My mom would have done it better" hurts much more than I'd like to admit.
I don't hold it against her, after all, she doesn't know her innocently said words hurt but that doesn't make it hurt less. I love this girl like my son and I know she loves me too, so when I hear the word "not real" it kind of make me feel fake. '
Worse still, her mother is a witch, the last time she came to pick up her daughter, she took one look at her andsaid "what has she been feeding you! You look so lean and pale" I was angry, not one word of appreciation came from her slutty mouth. Her girl is looking egret tall and slim just like her dad and she looked beautiful but the witch didn't see that.
The only appreciation I get for all this is the love this girl has for my son and how much her dad loves me and my son in return, those are the reasons I still feel blessed despite all.
I provide her financial, emotional support yet I'm always introduced as "not my real mom" I'm fine with that but then, one look at the reaction on people's face and my heart breaks.
So why am I writing this? Being a step mom is hard on us so why do people look at us like we are an outcast or something? You might be thinking she snatched the husband from the other woman or something, but before judging, know the story behind it.
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