I and my husband were feeling young at heart after two kids and we decided to go clubbing on one Friday night. We “off-loaded” the kids at the Grandma’s house and we felt like teenagers again.
We decided we should maximise this moment to the fullest because our realities are waiting for us in form of our kids. We made a stop at a fancy restaurant to grab some dinner, we were placed on a table for two. Everything seems cosy with the soft music coming from the speakers, the light in the room was dim and we have candles on the table. I was mesmerised. The waiter took the order for our main menu while we enjoyed our starter’s.
We were waiting for our meal to come, I just took a glance across the room and I noticed this elderly couple. The woman should be in her mid-forties while the man should be getting close to fifty if I’m guessing right from their looks. What really drew me to them was the nasty look she was giving me across the room. I whispered to my husband to confirm if the look was actually for us and he confirmed it. I wondered what we must have done to deserve the look. It bothered me until the end of the meal that I could not wait for us to leave.
I excused myself to use the restroom before leaving, I walked in there only to bump into the woman. I asked her if she knew me from somewhere and she replied “no! with disgust clearly all over her face. I asked her why was she then looking at me in that manner and she said, “Even if you want to be a slut, must you be doing it to a young married man, do you want to ruin his home”. I told her ” Madam, learn to mind your business, the man you are talking about is my legally wedded husband with two kids!.
She could not believe ears. She said it was because she didn’t see any ring on my fingers and she could see my husband wearing a ring, so that was why she has that impression of who I am. She was so embarrassed, she apologised and left the room. I could not believe I was bothered about nothing.
I told my husband it in the car and we had a good laugh about it. We remembered a similar situation we had at the mall, I got into an argument with a woman over parking space and the next thing she said was “ashewo! husband snatcher, go and marry, following a married man up and down, go and marry” she screamed. Sigh!
Was it my fault that robbers took my wedding ring at gunpoint riding alone in traffic? Should I have not released the ring to the thief because of what the society will think of me ? It was a horrible day in my life and it’s nothing compared to all these judgements I’m getting from all these ‘holier than tho women’.
We have decided we are getting another set of rings for our fifth wedding anniversary, and that’s one year and three months away from now. Since my husband or his families are not complaining about my ringless finger, then I don’t care what a stranger thinks of me, judge all you want. Been faithfully married for me, is a state of the mind, it is not justifiable with just a piece of jewellery. There are loads of married men in this state that has never removed their rings since they got married but are steadily violating their weddings vows.
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