I don’t know why or how it started, but my husband would rather masturbate to porn than have sex with me. I’m a full housewife, and our sex life has been pretty much boring these past few years.
My marriage was 10 years old last year December, and we celebrated it in grand style. Meanwhile, I never for once knew my husband masturbates, although I wonder how he can go on for months without wanting sex or demanding for it, and when I demand for it he only does that because that’s what I want, it was always so obvious that he didn’t want it.
It was a long time before I got to know this, my husband likes to work from home in the morning before leaving for work later in the day, during the time that he’s at home, he’ll lock himself up and warn that no one to disturb him. I don’t know what goes on behind closed doors, apparently a lot. He apparently needed a quality time to use his palm and his porn to pleasure himself, after which he’s ready for the day’s work.
For lunch he sends his secretary to buy him snacks, and after lunch he goes at it again in the office, so I can categorically say that this dad and husband of mine masturbates two times or more a day. He then leaves to attend to some things he has to.
When he gets back from work, I’ll kiss him welcome, late at night while in bed I’ll tell him him my day was and he’ll listen attentively to all I’ve got to say. But that’s all I get from him, a listening ear, but he has no sexual desire for me at all and all my efforts to get him to make love to me are all in vain.
And when he finally agrees to have sex, he only lasts for a minute or two, and I’m left wanting more and feeling unwanted. But then, I didn’t know the cause of this, all I knew was that our sex life was plainly boring.
At first I thought it was me, I thought something was definitely wrong with me, but it was him, not me.
The bubble burst the day I forgot something at home and I came back home to get it, he forgot to lock the door to his bathroom, when I opened the door “what the fuck….” My jaw dropped, tears of indignity ran down my face.
“How could you!” I screamed. I went straight back to work, but I couldn’t concentrate. I cried all day, all my thought was, “I’m not good enough” “How could I be ready to give everything to him and he prefers to jerk off?”
He came to me late at night and said he loves me, I looked at him in the face and slapped him,
“How could you say you love me when you cheat on me”
“I don’t cheat on you ” he replied.
“You don’t cheat on me with a girl but cheat on me by watching porn and jerking off, it’s the same”
Worse still, he can’t change, even though he promised he won’t do that again, I know he has been doing it. He’s just so addicted.
Now I don’t know what to do, I’m trying to advise myself because I can’t tell this to anyone, they won’t see it as a problem, but I see it as a problem.
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