How a woman spaces her children differs from woman to woman. The last thing on a first-time mother’s mind after the birth of her baby is child spacing.
During the first few weeks after childbirth, the mother is too exhausted and most likely not even ready to think about sex, talk of child spacing. But as the cries of baby fades into the months and the scar of childbirth heals, when the pains of labour become a thing of the past, the mother may then start thinking of having another child.
And most times the way a woman feels about child spacing before she had a baby is not the same way she will feel after she becomes a mother. A lot of things will affect her thinking, so no matter how carefully a mother planned the spacing of her children, sometimes it’s not entirely in her control.
Usually, for the first six months of breastfeeding their baby, nursing moms are normally unable to conceive and this is because, for the entire time that they are breastfeeding their baby, some moms don’t ovulate. But note that this doesn’t happen to all women, some women take in a month after pregnancy.
However in considering what gap you intend to put between your children, take a look at these.
Ideal Spacing
Is there anything such as ideal spacing? A study suggests that parents should wait for 18 to 23 months after a full-term birth before conceiving again. The concern of the study is the health of the infant because there’s a higher risk of prematurity and low birth weight in babies that are conceived within six months of a previous birth compared to the ones born 18 to 23 months after. Although many parents consider a lot of other things in deciding the spacing of their children, for instance, old age. But if the welfare of your child is your major concern then you should wait for at least 18 to 23 months before trying to have a baby again.
Having Babies Close Together
In a survey, a mother of four whose children were 19 months apart said, at first, it was a mistake, but then, she later planned her children to be months apart because she wants them to be best friends and be able to relate with each other easily. So far, her wish has come true. Her children are playmates.
Another mother said she chose to space her children closely 20 months and 15 months apart so each of her children will have someone close in age with, but she warned that having children close together is very difficult, especially when they are still young.
Parents who have children close in age always complain that getting past their young age is hard, but some do it because they want to quickly get over the hard task of childbirth as soon as practically possible.
Although if you are not prepared and you are caught by surprise, it can be very tiring. A mom from experience advised that “If you’re thinking of spacing your children less than two years apart, don’t do it. You’ll never have a moment to breathe”
And if you do it and come out unscathed, you will be happy you made that decision. They will be best friends, play together and share toys, she said. Two years we think is a good age gap between siblings though.
Babies Further Apart
Parents who had children further apart had something different to say. The younger ones relate better with each other than with the older one. A mother says “spacing apart works fine,” “My older child is always ready to help and is happy she has siblings” “In fact, she backs my last born for me”
“But looking at it in another way, it’s not good because the older one sees the younger ones as small rats who messes with their things, and is always tired of playing the big sister” They don’t even play together.”
Another mother opined that “If children are spaced by ten years or more, they won’t feel like siblings. My brother was 10 years older than I, and he was more like a babysitter to me. So we couldn’t relate like brothers and sisters.”
Spacing your children close together is fine if you are ready for the extra troubles and sleepless nights and it shouldn’t be closer than 18-23 months, spacing apart like 2 years apart is fine too, but spacing ten years and more apart is not advisable.
Reasons are these; there are so many risks involved, because as the mother gets older, the risk of miscarriage and birth defects is increased. But of course, it’s okay for you to put a large gap between your children if you started giving birth in your early twenties since the risk is reduced.
Like I said earlier, even if you make plans about how you’ll space your children before you start having them, be flexible, because nature has other plans, and you mightn’t have any other choice than to go with what nature dictates at some point. Make your child spacing plans but stay flexible.
Comments
Comments
